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The adventures of CamelToé HungryBum and baby Tom

CamelToe & HungryBum HungryToe Tom Frank & George chillin!
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Twitter? Or just a twit?

He makes it so easy for people to take the Mickey out of him………………

Julius Malema became the laughing stock, again, by ignorantly threatening to close down Twitter. It seems the poor guys feelings were hurt when fraudulent accounts claiming to be him had been opened on the social network.

In response, Twitter users have retaliated by targeting ANC Youth League president and declaring Friday as “Julius Malema Day“. Several new accounts have been opened on the micro-blogging service in defiance to the ANCYL claims. They have also started circulating jokes featuring the firebrand leader.

The goal of the “Julius Malema Day” is to illustrate how powerful social networking can be and the importance for politicians to take social media seriously.

ANCYL spokesperson Floyd Shivambu has been quoted as saying “We don’t follow up on petty issues; it’s not even a story. We have bigger battles to fight and this internet doesn’t even speak to our people,” I hate to tell you this Floyd, but people with even a basic phone can access a social network, and how many people do you know that have cell phones? Food for thought I recon

Happy Friday everyone !

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SA’s Big Talent All the Way from Mitchells Plain

Once upon a time…

James Bhemgee (now 45) and his big voice was sweeping streets in the hope that someone will ‘spot’ him and have a heart . A certain someone did. Widow, Angelique Fuhr (83) overheard him singing on the job and gave him something that changed his life forever:  She sponsored his first singing lessons and convinced Young and Rubicam to sponsor his studies further.  He got the break he wanted. It’s easy to read this and think: Yeah, that’s real nice of her. But let me tell you, this is way more than ‘nice’. How many of us will actually stop to give someone – a street sweeper! – the time of day? Especially if it involves your bank balance.

Aaaanyway, he eventually studied, moved to the UK and appeared on Breakfast News where one thing led to another and he moved to the United States.

He made his comeback on SA’s got Talent recently. His talent and humble attitude won him votes and the hearts of many a viewer. James told TVSA that he’s going to take his quarter of a million rand and buy himself a house. Hope this is not the end of him…

This is stuff dreams (and documentaries)  are made of, don’t you think?

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Of Cockroaches and Rodents…

Love him or hate him, one thing’s for sure – he is an opinion columnist’s dream. This week, the ever intriguing ANCYL leader Julius Malema courted (yet more) controversy. In an address to ANC supporters at a rally in Cloetesville, outside Stellenbosch, in the Western Cape – which just so happens to be a Democratic Alliance stronghold – he referred to the leader of the official opposition, Helen Zille as a ‘cockroach’, who needed to be removed from office.

Predictably, the comment got his detractors hot under the collar and set off fierce protestations in Parliament, with Lance Greyling of the Independent Democrats comparing his remark to that made by instigators of the Rwandan genocide in the 1990s, and to Hitler’s use of the term for Jewish people in the late 1930s. Admirably, the mature and genteel elder statesman, Kgalema Motlanthe stepped in to dissipate the ill-feeling, pointing out that Malema’s comments were indicative of ‘downright, simple bad manners.’

And just in case you thought that South African politicians were the only ones with a penchant for displaying bad manners in public – and likening their political rivals to vermin – think again. In the same week, Harriet Harman, Deputy Leader of the UK’s Labour Party, dealt Treasury Secretary Danny Alexander a low blow.  Speaking at a rally in Oban, Scotland – a town which lies in a Liberal Democrat constituency – Harman referred to the hapless Alexander – a redheaded Scot and a Liberal Democrat – as a ‘ginger rodent [that] we never want to see in the highlands of Scotland’. Scottish nationalists were quick to get militant, claiming the remark was ‘deeply offensive’, ‘anti-redhead’ and ‘anti-Scottish’. It was up to Labour leader Ed Milliband to step in and quell the riot – Harman, ironically a former Minister of Equality in the previous government, was forced to apologise and withdraw the ‘rodent slur’.

In the words of the erstwhile (charismatic) Soviet leader, Nikita Khrushchev, ‘Politicians are the same all over.’

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Letter to the Government: The Follow-Up

In case you missed The Letter, you can catch up on it here.

This is what has happened in the meantime…

Gareth Cliff: “I had a great lunch with Presidential Spokesperson Zizi Kodwa, in his personal capacity today. I had the duck, he had the fish. We discussed my letter to Government, the Information Bill, his recent trip to Egypt, and his allergy to some kind of tree that grows in Cape Town.

I’m sorry to disappoint those who thought he wanted to shut me down; and to those who thought he’d arrive with a detailed 5-year plan to address all the points of my letter, I will remind you that these things are a process - and that government acknowledges many of the matters raised.

The overwhelming tone and direction was positive, constructive and amiable. Zizi did suggest that I don’t tell any cabinet ministers that they’re ugly, something my own mother reminded me is very bad manners. The channels of communication are open, there was no draconian reprimand and he insisted that I continue to engage with government and society about things which we all ought to be brave enough to discuss, even if we disagree.

I maintain that we have all the problems to contend with ahead of us, and I won’t back down from my belief that these things need to be addressed urgently. This is the first step. The journey for South Africa, in the words of Mark Gevisser is a “rocky road rather than a flight in a space-ship.”

So to those who thought I was anti-government, no gallows have been constructed on the lawns of the Union Buildings. I have been reassured that we live in a free, open, tolerant society where your opinions and mine can share a space. There will be many conversations in the future, and I am pleased to say that the President’s office can take criticism better than even I thought they could. In the words of President Zuma : “That’s where the difference comes…”.

Now the real work must begin… ”

Reference: Chronicles of Cliff

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Unite in black and white

Because Phuthu is born and bred in KZN, our allegiance is with the Sharks this weekend as they battle it out against Western Province in the 50th ABSA Currie Cup final.

In preparation for Saturday, the Sharks are calling on the people of KZN to unite and show their support by switching school uniforms and work attire for the most imaginative black and white outfits in celebration of “Black & White Friday” today.

Remember to keep your world black and white on Saturday as well, whether you are cheering at The Shark Tank or elsewhere! Unfortunately I won’t be at the Shark Tank this weekend, as my husband and I will be visiting Lazy River Farm in Nottingham Rd. They don’t have a TV there, however the Bierfassl Restaurant does, so here’s to some good German cuisine, “eine grosse bier” and a spectacular final!

Good luck to both teams, especially Western Province, you going to need it :)

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What do you think of Gareth Cliff’s open letter to Zuma?

Dear Government

OK, I get it, the President isn’t the only one in charge. The ANC believes in “collective responsibility” (So that nobody has to get blamed when things get screwed up), so I address this to everyone in government – the whole lot of you – good, bad and ugly (That’s you, Blade).

We were all so pleased with your renewed promises to deliver services (we’ll forgive the fact that in some places people are worse off than in 1994); to root out corruption (so far your record is worse than under Mbeki, Mandela or the Apartheid regime – what with family members becoming overnight millionaires); and build infrastructure (State tenders going disgustingly awry and pretty stadia standing empty notwithstanding) – and with the good job you did when FIFA were telling you what to do for a few months this year. Give yourselves half a pat on the back. Since President Sepp went off with his billions I’m afraid we have less to be proud of – Public Servants Strikes, more Presidential bastard children, increasing unemployment and a lack of leadership that allowed the Unions to make the elected government it’s bitch. You should be more than a little worried – but you’re not. Hence my letter. Here are some things that might have passed you by:

  1. You have to stop corruption. Don’t stop it because rich people moan about it and because it makes poor people feel that you are self-enriching parasites of state resources, but because it is a disease that will kill us all. It’s simple – there is only so much money left to be plundered. When that money runs out, the plunderers will raise taxes, chase and drain all the remaining cash out of the country and be left with nothing but the rotting remains of what could have been the greatest success story of post-colonial Africa. It’s called corruption because it decomposes the fabric of society. When someone is found guilty of corruption, don’t go near them – it’s catchy. Making yourself rich at the country’s expense is what colonialists do.
  2. Stop complaining about the media. You’re only complaining about them because they show you up for how little you really do or care. If you were trying really hard, and you didn’t drive the most expensive car in the land, or have a nephew who suddenly went from modesty to ostentatious opulence, we’d have only positive things to report. Think of Jay Naidoo, Geraldine Fraser-Moleketi and Zwelinzima Vavi – they come under a lot of fire, but it’s never embarrassing – always about their ideas, their positions, and is perfectly acceptable criticism for people in power to put up with. When the media go after Blade Nzimande, Siphiwe Nyanda and the President, they say we need a new piece of legislation to “make the media responsible”. That’s because they’re being humiliated by the facts we uncover about them daily, not because there is an agenda in some newsroom. If there had been a free press during the reigns of Henry VIII, Idi Amin or Hitler, their regimes might just have been kept a little less destructive, and certainly would have been less brazen and unchecked.
  3. Education is a disaster. We’re the least literate and numerate country in Africa. Zimbabwe produces better school results and turns out smarter kids than we do. Our youth aren’t usemployed, they’re unemployable. Outcomes-based-education, Teachers’ Unions and an attitude of mediocrity that discourages excellence have reduced us to a laughing stock. Our learners can’t spell, read, add or subtract. What are all these people going to do? Become President? There’s only one job like that. We need clever people, not average or stupid ones. the failure of the Education Department happened under your watch. Someone who writes Matric now hadn’t even started school under the Apartheid regime, so you cannot blame anyone but yourselves for this colossal cock-up. Fix it before three-quarters of our matrics end up begging on Oxford Road. Reward schools and teachers who deliver great pass rates and clever students into the system. Fire the teachers who march and neglect their classrooms.
  4. Give up on BEE. It isn’t working. Free shares for new black partnerships in old white companies has made everyone poorer except for Tokyo Sexwale. Giving people control of existing business won’t make more jobs either. In fact, big companies aren’t growing, they’re reducing staff and costs. The key is entrepreneurship. People with initiative, creative ideas and small companies must be given tax breaks and assistance. Young black professionals must be encouraged to start their own businesses rather than join a big corporation’s board as their token black shareholder or director. Government must also stop thinking that state employment is a way to decrease unemployment – it isn’t – it’s a tax burden. India and China are churning out new, brilliant, qualified people at a rate that makes us look like losers. South Africa has a proud history of innovation, pioneering and genius. This is the only way we can advance our society and economy beyond merely coping.
  5. Stop squabbling over power. Offices are not there for you to occupy (or be deployed to) and aggrandize yourself. Offices in government are there to provide a service. If you think outrageous salaries, big German cars, first-class travel and state housing are the reasons to aspire to leadership, you’re in the wrong business – you should be working for a dysfunctional, tumbledown parastatal (or Glenn Agliotti). We don’t care who the Chairperson of the National Council of Provinces is if we don’t have running water, electricity, schools and clean streets. You work for us. Do your job, don’t imagine you ARE your job.
  6. Stop renaming things. Build new things to name. If I live in a street down which the sewage runs, I don’t care if it’s called Hans Strijdom or Malibongwe. Calling it something nice and new won’t make it smell nice and new. Re-branding is something Cell C do with Trevor Noah, not something you can whitewash your lack of delivery with.
  7. Don’t think you’ll be in power forever. People aren’t as stupid as you think we are. We know you sit around laughing about how much you get away with. We’ll take you down, either at the polls – or if it comes down to the wire – by revolution (Yes, Julius, the real kind, not the one you imagine happened in 2008). Careless, wasteful and wanton government is a thing of the past. The days of thin propaganda and idealized struggle are over. The people put you in power – they will take you out of it. Africa is tired of tin-pot dictators, one-party states and banana republics. We know who we are now, we care about our future – and so should you.

So, what is your take on this? Is he echoing what most South Africans are burning to say or do you think he is just plain cheeky?

Reference: Gareth Cliff.com